What Sex Education Taught Me

I recently binged on Sex Education. No I am not referring to the awkward lessons of adolescence.

The Netflix series indeed has it’s unpleasant moments as it focuses on a high school age troupe of characters navigating the lifelong adventure of discovering-oneself. The protagonist, Otis (Asa Butterfield), is the son of a divorced sex therapist (Gillian Anderson), who is persuaded by the cool girl (Emma Mackey) in school to start a relationship clinic at their private academy. The series is worthy of focus. It is good long form storytelling with well written dialog and appropriate ups and downs and twists and turns. I enjoyed the experience.

A scene that lingers for me is late in the premier season. Otis, the teenage therapist, is discovered as not having had intimate relations through an unexpected encounter with Lily (Tanya Reynolds), a sex-crazed nerd. She is kind enough to keep the dilemma to herself but realizes it is a bargaining chip for free therapy services when she discovers her theory of sex does not match her experience. Otis reluctantly takes on the case. Otis needed to do so for the obvious reason of protecting a budding industry and more importantly his all important high school dignity. HE also needed to take on the case because it is his own narrative.

Otis is wise (and actually beyond his years which is somewhat of a shortcoming of the writing) and practices a well known therapy tactic of using another field of physical practice to alter the mental experience of a patient. He takes Lily by bike to a large meadow with an epic hill. His treatment is for her to ride down the hill. He suggests that she needs to face a fear and embrace it, or rather she needs to let herself go. Lily is rightfully hesitant and in the moment suggests that Otis too needs to let himself go. Lily then takes off with Otis watching. Within short order he realizes she is correct. He too proceeds down the rough hillside to experience freedom.

The advice is astute. We are often the greatest obstacle to achieving our desires. The way we can find freedom from our mental blocks is likely to let go. To embrace the choice and let the hill take us to our destination. YES it will be incredibly scary. YES we will certainly lose control and YES we will fall. BUT that pain of that moment of hitting the ground and even the weeks of recovery will never be as great as the agony of living life having not tried.

Hop on your bike and find a place to experience flow in a realm that is somewhat uncomfortable so you can sit in your studio and produce what needs to be produced.