Tag Archive for: fear


Confidence is hard to find because it is not something that exists on its own. It is something that has to be developed.

In our early life, confidence comes easy. We do not have any limits because we do not understand the physical boundaries of the universe nor the social constructs of society. And, if we are fortunate we have cheerleaders. We touch hot stoves. We leap off sofas. We work on an ollie repeatedly until we get it. Our parents congratulate our first simple words. Our grandparents push us to try new foods. Our friends egg us on to hit the jump one more time. We push ourselves out of naivete, out curiosity, out of ambition and out of the encouragement of others to mature and get better.

The opportunities are endless in early life. We will become the next Shaun White. We will master the Sommelier’s level four. We will write the next To Kill a Mockingbird. We literally can do anything.

Then something happens.

We learn to fear. We get hard introductions to gravity. We get laughed at for our crude drawings. We get told our writing is not good because of technical conventions. We start to experience the ease of being comfortable and rarely venture beyond the simple tastes we were able to develop in early childhood. We get stuck and our confidence falters.

How much better would our ability become if we got back up after the fall and did it again? How much more refined might our skills become if we pressed on through the practice? How much more nuanced might our taste be if we continued to explore the unknown? How much stronger would we be as a person if we ignored the external and internal critic?

How much further could we have gone if only we had continued to expand our confidence?

Turning Pro

There is a distinct feeling that comes when it happens. You will be different. This is strange because it has been small things that have lead up to the leap.

The best I can describe it is how I feel just about every morning when I head to the crossfit gym. The coaches post our workouts the night before, however I do not look at them. I just do not want to know. It is hard enough to roll out of bed pre-dawn, it would only be worse if I had some inclination of beating my body was about to take.

There is always a tinge of fear.

I am over two years into the experience of crossfit, yet every day the anxiety is real. I know what I am about to do will change me. I desire the change, yet the mind makes it hard to pursue the work.

So then I wonder what is it that keeps me going?

The gym is the place where I know I have agency. I decide to wake up early. I decide to embrace the weather during the walk. I decide to enter the sweatbox in the summer. I decide to look at the looming pain prescription on the board. I decide to warm up my body. I decide to work through the strain. I decide how far i will push my body. I decide how great I will be. I decide my future.

The same thing happens in our careers.

Turning Pro is deciding what you will do instead of letting anyone or anything decide for you.

Turning Pro is YOU finding agency over YOUR vocation!